Benjamin Esham

Within each proton and neutron, three quarks are held together by nature’s strongest force: the fear of missing out. This area of study is called quantum fomodynamics

You are valid! 🤗🥰 But your code isn’t. I think you need a closing brace on line 25

At some point in the not-too-distant past I started pronouncing “anniversary” with an “sh” instead of an “s” sound, like /ˌænɪˈvɝʃɹi/. I have no idea why this happened 🤔

You think you have it bad? 15th-century software developers had to deal with the entire day of February 24th being doubled during leap years.

Why did they call it Better Than Bouillon and not Bisquick

what breweries want to sell: tallboys

what I want to buy: smolboys

Advent of Code is going well so far.

A GitHub screenshot showing that 100% of the code in my repository is written in Awk.

In software development—at least in the professional context—the following statements are both true:

  1. Naming things well is difficult.
  2. If you aren’t good at naming things, you have a significant gap in your skill set.

In computer science, the CAP theorem states that you can have at most two of cherry pie, apple pie, and pumpkin pie before you start to get a stomachache.

Me: What are you up to?

Nix: Nothing much, just compiling a few different versions of bash


Nix: Why are you looking at me like that?

The Winnie the Pooh meme. Next to the normal Pooh is the formula T minus V and next to the fancy Pooh is T plus V.

If you have a blog but it doesn’t have an RSS feed… you don’t have a blog.

“Mirrors and Scrum are abominable, since they both multiply the numbers of managers.” — Borges

Just got a set of bed linens honoring my favorite artist. Pillowcases, duvet cover, the works. Now I have cascading Harry Styles sheets

Who was this ancient human? What was his life like? What were his dreams, his hopes, his fears? And most importantly, what was he trying to do? These are the questions I ask when I start work in the morning and realize I was in the middle of a Git rebase

They say the two happiest microseconds in a muon owner’s life are when it’s emitted and when it decays

A particle accelerator is a hole in the quark–gluon plasma that you pour money into

The air cools. Crisp leaves dance on the breeze, leaving the aromas of apple and cinnamon in their wake. Sipping my annual pumpkin spice latte, I send the annual text to my family warning them off of the new iOS because it’s still buggy as shit

I haven’t been in much of a blogging (or microblogging) mood recently, but I’ll just say that Black lives matter. This is such an understatement—it’s such a bare minimum—but since it still needs to be said, I’m saying it.

Between March and November, if I need to mention my time zone I say “Pacific time” because “Pacific Daylight Time” sounds too pedantic but I’m sure as hell not going to say “Pacific Standard Time.”